Police Jokes

The Boston Taxi Driver Backed Into The S

The Boston Taxi Driver Backed Into The Stationary Fruit Stall And Within Seconds He Had A Cop Beside Him. "Name? " "Brendan Oconnor. " "Same As Mine. Where Are You From? " "County Cork. " "Same As Me. . . . . . " The Policeman Paused With His Pen In The Air. "Hold On A Moment And Ill Come Back And Talk About The Old County. I Want To Say Something To This Fella That Ran Into The Back Of Your Cab. "

Sitting On The Side Of The Highway Waiti

Sitting On The Side Of The Highway Waiting To Catch Speeding Drivers, A State Police Officer Sees A Car Puttering Along At 22 Mph. He Thinks To Himself, "This Driver Is Just As Dangerous As A Speeder!"So He Turns On His Lights And Pulls The Driver Over. Approaching The Car, He Notices That There Are Five Old Ladies, Two In The Front Seat And Three In The Back, Wide Eyed And White As Ghosts. The Driver, Obviously Confused, Says To Him, "Officer, I Dont Understand, I Was Doing Exactly The Speed Limit! What Seems To Be The Problem? ""Maam, " The Officer Replies, "You Werent Speeding, But You Should Know That Driving Slower Than The Speed Limit Can Also Be A Danger To Other Drivers. ""Slower Than The Speed Limit? No Sir, I Was Doing The Speed Limit Exactly Twenty-Two Miles An Hour!" The Old Woman Says A Bit Proudly. The State Police Officer, Trying To Contain A Chuckle Exp Lains To Her That "22" Was The Route Number, Not The Speed Limit. A Bit Embarrassed, The Woman Grinned And Thanked The Officer For Pointing Out Her Error. "But Before I Let You Go, Maam, I Have To Ask. . . Is Everyone In This Car Ok? These Women Seem Awfully Shaken And They Havent Muttered A Single Peep This Whole Time, " The Officer Asks. "Oh, Theyll Be All Right In A Minute Officer. We Just Got Off Route 142. "

Returning Home From Work, A Blonde Was S

Returning Home From Work, A Blonde Was Shocked To Find Her House Ransacked And Burglarized. She Telephoned The Police At Once And Reported The Crime. The Police Dispatcher Broadcast The Call And A K-9 Unit Patrolling Nearby Was The First To Respond. As The K-9 Officer Approached The House With His Dog On A Leash, The Blonde Ran Out On The Porch, Shuddered At The Sight Of The Cop And His Dog, Then Sat Down On The Steps. Putting Her Face In Her Hands, She Moaned: "I Come Home To Find All My Possessions Stolen. I Call The Police For Help, And What Do They Do? They Send Me A Blind Policeman!"

Recently, A Distraught Wife Went To The

Recently, A Distraught Wife Went To The Local Police Station, Along With Her Next-Door Neighbor, To Report That Her Husband Was Missing. The Policeman Asked For A Description Of The Missing Man. The Wife Said, "He Is 35 Years Old, 6-Foot 4-Inches, Has Dark Eyes, Dark Wavy Hair, An Athletic Build, Weighs 185 Pounds, Is Soft-Spoken, And Is Good To The Children. "The Next-Door Neighbor Protested, "Your Husband Is 5-Foot 8-Inches, Chubby, Bald, Has A Big Mouth, And Is Mean To Your Children. "The Wife Replied, "Yes, But Who Wants Him Back? "